Leia
Wet hair, don’t care.
People who shop at Walmart don’t have time to wait until their hair is completely dry to continue with their day. They are movers and shakers. They have business to attend to. As you can see, this woman isn’t even taking the time to look where she’s going. She’s got deals to make, emails to answer, and, I’m guessing, a tanning booth appointment later. Her hair is the least of her worries.
The fashion at Walmart has no limits. You think it’s going to be a bunch of people wearing “I’m With Stupid” T-shirts, but then you go in and see hoodies that support everything from local high school football teams to local NFL teams. She genuinely looks like she’s having a nice day, and I hope this is how we all dress from now on.
Why not get married at the place that means the most to you?
You can buy her the diamond ring at Walmart. You can propose over the intercom. Why not have the most romantic day of your life in the store itself? The something blue is already there all over the signage. The old, the new are the TVs (some are opened), and the something borrowed is the money you charged on your Walmart credit card for the arch.
I would have never been this calm in a store as a kid. It’s very sweet that they did this for their parents. I wonder if they were bribed with a trip to the toy section if they were quiet for the ceremony. I also wonder if anyone grabbed a bag of rice and started throwing it. Walmart has everything you need for a flawless wedding!
The one that got away.
We’ve seen people on leashes. We’ve seen ducks on leashes. But this is the scariest of all: someone on a leash who clearly was abandoned or escaped. This is like a still from a horror movie. I’m worried she’ll turn around and be a vampire or, you know, super attractive. Then I’ll really have to do some thinking about judging the people in this store.
Maybe she still thinks someone is holding the leash? I wonder when she’ll realize she’s free.
